You’re a fake, baby. You can’t conceal it. Part III.

I’m on a roll, folks.

A fake Facebooker pretended to be from this area. I won’t say the exact town. But let’s just say I was so ready to call her bluff.

She, like others, never called me by my first name. She only addressed me by “sweetie”, “dear”, or some other term of endearment. Too soon, I say. At least three other fakes have done that — and should be tips to you as well.

Nevertheless, early one Monday morning, I called her bluff. “How about we meet for dinner tonight at (local restaurant, name of which is intentionally deleted)?” I asked her in Facebook Messenger

“Yes we can,” the fake said.

“What time tonight?” I asked.

“Maybe 7,” the fake responded.

Now from there, the fake might come up with all sorts of excuses to bypass my invite. Maybe even ask for a Vanilla Card for gas money.

Before she could, once we unofficially made the date, she already fell into my trap.

Right after her “maybe” response of 7 p.m. for a dinner date, I responded with a “laugh out loud” emoji and an image. The image was a particular portion of the restaurant’s Facebook page clearly listing its hours of operation. More than one restaurant in this area is closed all day Sunday and Monday. The restaurant I designated just happened to be closed on Monday.

“Every real person in town knows (the restaurant I designated) is closed on Mondays. You fail. You’re a FAKE!”

The fake responded with insults and expletives. But wait — there was more.

I also told the fake just in recent days I had written extensively on Facebook profiles and shared these links from this website.

The fake called me an a–hole and self-destructed her profile soon thereafter.

Hard not to hum the chorus line of “Another One Bites the Dust”. But she’ll just reload, snarf images from someone else, and try to steal someone else’s heart, and money, again.

Don’t let it be you.

So, as a public service, here are a couple of YouTube videos that have helped this writer along the way. May these help you, too.

You’re a fake, baby. You can’t conceal it. Part II.

A follow-up to this recent post is in order. A special hello to ScamHaters United on Facebook is also in order. I hope you’re finding this information useful. Even if you’re not in the group, I hope you find this information useful.

In busting fake profiles on Facebook, I’ve looked for context clues. So when a stranger friends you, ask yourself this question. Does the Facebooker’s photos match the Facebooker’s (alleged) city of residence? Here’s what I mean by that.

One recent fake claimed to be from Oxford, Mississippi — one of the unique towns in all of the southeastern United States. If she’s in Oxford, I wondered, how come her profile had zero images of her at Ole Miss football games or any other sporting events? No images at all from campus, The Grove, The Lyceum, Walk of Champions, etc. No images at all from the historic downtown area and vicinity. There were images of her and results of turkey hunts in cold weather environments — but that was it.

For those outside of Mississippi, please understand I’ve lived in the Hattiesburg area, about four hours south of Oxford, for more than three decades. I’ve only visited Oxford twice in as many years for conventions. Prior to the conventions, I’ve worked with colleagues who are proud Ole Miss graduates. So I’ve learned a thing or two about Oxford from them and the conventions.

“You’re in Oxford, right?” I asked the fake in Messenger while we were making small talk. “Yeah,” she said.

It was pop quiz time. “You have 35 seconds,” I challenged her in Messenger, “to name five restaurants in downtown Oxford — starting NOW!” That would give her five seconds to read the pop quiz question and the remaining 30 seconds to quickly type and list restaurants, right? Given the timing of everything, I’d allow for spelling errors.

Well, no reaction for the longest time. She apparently spent 20 seconds googling “restaurants in downtown Oxford, Mississippi”. When 20 seconds elapsed, I typed, “Tick tock!” — hinting she was running out of time. By the time she typed “Ajax”, just one correct answer, her full 35-second time limit had elapsed.

My reaction: “A true Oxonian would quickly name five restaurants in less than 30 seconds. Thank you for proving to me you’re not a true Oxonian. You’re a fake.”

The fake’s reaction: “What’s Oxonian?”

“Oxonian”, in case you haven’t connected the dots, is the demonym for an Oxford, Mississippi, resident. They base the noun on Oxonians in Oxford, England. In tennis terms, the fake committed a double fault.

I unfortunately have forgotten her name — but she has headed for the hills — just like the other fakes I outed.

You’re a fake, baby. You can’t conceal it.

Doug’s Place Flashback: Remember this post?

Mary’s Twitter page is still active as of this writing, but no new tweets since 2018.

Meantime, this happened…

…Serra William of Kansas City, Kansas, friended me on Facebook today. In trying to make small talk with her on Messenger, I noted I’m a native of Wichita. The Kansas chat didn’t go very far. Neither did the regional initialism of KCK.

As we chatted, I realized she looked familiar. A look at another photo on her profile…

…made me recall the fake Twitter account of 2018. Getting some ten-year-old, but still valid, intel about fake online dating profiles from a YouTuber, I did a Google Images search of the above photo. The search lead me to a lady named Amber Hahn.

“Amber”. I remember the name “Amber”. She said the name “Amber” in that Twitter video from 2018 — even though the Twitter account indicated her first name was Mary. I “confronted” Mary about the utterance of “Amber”, and she quickly brushed me off.

So, guess what? I confronted Serra and asked, “Has anyone ever told you that you look like Amber Hahn, the internet personality?” (Honestly, folks, I don’t know much about the real Amber beyond that.)

Serra’s response: “No”.

My follow-up response: “These show up on Google searches…”

…and “these”, indeed, are a cross-reference of “Amber Hahn” in another visual search of Google. Notice how the photo of Amber in the light blue shirt at the top of the left column (complete with the circular yellow Buc-ee’s logo) matches the one of Serra in her profile pic in the earlier example image of this post.

Serra deflected confrontation as best as she could — changing the subject and asking personal questions such as my age, marital status, etc. Before things got too personal, I took a page from “Match Game”.

Doug’s Place Flashback: For those who’ve lived under a rock, the objective of the classic TV game show “Match Game” was to match celebrities’ answers to silly fill-in-the-blank questions. Celebrities would write their answers on cards, and, after the civilian contestant offered an answer, the stars would reveal their cards to the camera one by one. Depending on the version, the civilian would be awarded at least one point or some money (more likely the former) for each match.

So, based on that concept, I showed this to Serra…

…I then told Serra if she wanted to converse with me any further, she had to duplicate this effort to prove to me she’s real. She had to take a piece of paper, write down “HI, DOUG” on it, have that message in front of her mouth, have her hand also in the shot, and send that selfie back.

Has she obliged? As of this writing, no. She’s done a good job of waffling, though.

I don’t mind telling you I’ve pulled off similar feats with no less than seven other fakers. At least three tried to duplicate the “HI, DOUG” bit — but were quickly called out for sending fake images. I’ve been a web designer and social media manager for years. I can spot PhotoShopping and similar tactics a mile away. They end up heading for the hills while deleting their accounts after they were called out. Per Google Image searches, most of those fakes steal images from porn stars.

One fake managed to steal images from a real Facebooker who just happens to wear the uniform of our country (best to say nothing further about the real Facebooker). After this writer’s long and detailed investigation (about two or three months), the faker urged me to go to the store and buy her a Vanilla Card. From there, she’d probably borrow hundreds, even thousands, of dollars I’ll never see again.

“Before I go to the store and buy you a card,” I said in Facebook Messenger, “please explain why you’ve been stealing the images of (real person’s name intentionally deleted for said real person’s safety).” I accompanied my inquiry with a screenshot of the real person’s Facebook account, pinpointing to an image the faker clearly stole.

The faker’s response: “F**k u and go to hell.” The faker’s profile’s deletion immediately followed — likely per the faker.

Gosh, was it something I said and/or did? I’m so sorry I’m taking (potentially) ill-gotten funds away from your grubby little hands, Little Miss Faker.

If you believe my apology is sincere, I have ski resorts in Kansas City and Wichita, Kansas, I’d like to sell you.

The music has magic; you know you can catch it

With 2022 nearing an end, this is a good time to revisit one of the year’s most popular video clips with a critical eye — and perhaps ear. You’ve seen this a zillion times. Let’s make it a zillion and one.

Now I begin with a confession. I’m one of 12 people who hasn’t watched “The Boys” — even though I do have Amazon Prime. From what I’ve learned, filming takes place in Toronto even though it’s an American production.

Speaking of “American production”, the “Solid Gold” parody was done reasonably well.

My only quibble: If this scene parodied a normal episode, a regular “Solid Gold” show would include a countdown of the top ten songs in the country. The parody’s graphic had “Rapture” by Blondie ranking at #24. “The Boys” should’ve given Debbie Harry and company *tons* more respect. “Rapture” was actually a Billboard #1 hit for the band. I’d gather Radio & Records — which was the standard for the charts on “Solid Gold”, Rick Dees’ “Weekly Top 40”, and other syndicated radio shows — echoed this back in the day.

While “The Boys” may have unintentionally lowballed “Rapture”, Harry did approve of Soldier Boy’s performance. “Holy (censored)! Epic,” she tweeted. Harry and Blondie had been guests of the real “Solid Gold”. Harry even guest hosted an episode and had George Burns among her guests.

Unfortunately, those who announced the real “Solid Gold” have passed from this life to the next. The original announcer, Robert W. Morgan — a legend in the L.A. radio market — was there from the “Solid Gold ’79” two-hour pilot special until 1986. His successors you’ve heard of — or at least heard their work: Chuck Riley, Charlie O’Donnell, and Dick Tufeld.
 
So — the team on “The Boys” had to find someone else. And — at least to my ears — that someone else sounded like…

…John Barton — the announcer and a producer on the ill-fated Vancouver-based game show “Pitfall”.

According to a recent report, Barton hosted the pilot for “Pitfall” under a different game format. Other reports indicate the pilot had celebrities and bore some resemblance to “The Hollywood Squares”. When the show went to series as seen above, Alex Trebek hosted. Trebek later called it one of the great tragedies of his life. He wasn’t paid for his hosting duties. Further, there were numerous reports a lot of contestants didn’t win the furniture, cars, trips, money, etc., they earned in playing the bonus rounds.

But back to Barton. I wondered — could Barton have lent his voice to the “Solid Gold” parody? It’s a long shot, I know. But if a 94-year-old Johnny Gilbert is still working on “Jeopardy!”, the antithesis of a tragedy for Trebek, anything is possible. Next thing you know, I’m heading to Amazon Prime Video and straight to Season 3, Episode 4, entitled “Glorious Five Year Plan”.

It started with a recap of the previous episode — filled with explosions, blood, gore, and expletives (read: things that would make a standards and practices representative at a broadcast network cringe — but are totally acceptable in the wild West nature of streaming). Then we go right to the proper episode. It starts with the “Solid Gold” parody along with additional scenes from certain home viewers’ perspectives.

The curious bug was biting. So — I fast-forwarded to the closing credits. I got as far as director, writer, and developer. And then, before I could see further credits (names of guest stars, further crew, etc.), the next episode instantly kicked in. Darn. The mystery of who announced the “Solid Gold” parody remains that — a mystery.

The episode’s cast listing on IMDb didn’t provide any help. Apparently, everyone who had an on-screen credit got listed on IMDb, including Jensen Ackles as Soldier Boy, who covered Blondie’s “Rapture”.


ADDENDUM 11/27/22: This WikiBin article indicates John Barton is no longer with us. He passed away in 2014. A friend brought this to my attention after someone else started a discussion about “Pitfall” — and the game show’s $100,000 set construction, expensive by early 1980s standards in Canada — on Facebook.

As I originally wrote, connecting Barton to “The Boys” was a long shot and I now have my unfortunate answer. WikiBin indicates Barton had a nice comeback after the nightmare that was “Pitfall”. May he continue to Rest In Peace.


I’d still like to know who “introduced” Soldier Boy. In the event you can provide some legit information about who really announced this “Solid Gold” parody, please feel free to reply.

How it started; how we wish Geof were still with us

There is not too much I remember of the waning days of September of 1978 in Knoxville, Tennessee.

I remember both sets of grandparents were visiting ahead of the blessed event. I remember my mother was hospitalized in the final days of her pregnancy. I’m doing good enough to recall watching a rerun of “The Flintstones” on WATE-TV6 in Knoxville during one of those days. Later, I was on the phone with Mom and Dad from the hospital. Mom just happened to be watching the same episode in her room.

I was about to become a big brother at any moment. Then, October 1, 1978, arrived. So did Geoffrey Franklin Morris.

To paraphrase a common current phrase, if you knew Geof, you knew Geof. You knew him from his love of his alma mater’s hockey program — would that it was still in existence. You knew him from his love for science, math, aerospace, and aeronautical engineering. You knew him from his many passions for music, his love of Boston sports, and many more interests.

So, how are we doing since Geof’s untimely passing earlier this year? Well, then as now, I for one am speechless.

It’s been an unusual last couple of weeks. Under normal circumstances, I’d be shopping for birthday presents and I’d be making sure they’d head for his home in plenty of time. We’d probably discuss plans to visit there for Thanksgiving. It has felt strange not making those plans either.

As you probably know, I’ve traveled a similar road. I lost my wife just a week and a half into a particular calendar year — and endured a lot of normally happy occasions without her. Now, I’m without a brother ahead of his birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas.

Dreading what the rest of the year’s going to be like, here’s a big favor. If you’ve helped this way before, please help this way again. Geof loved the Mississippi School for Mathematics and Science in Columbus. There are some staffers who are still there from his days as a student. They’re just as stunned as we are.

Here’s how to donate…

Geof Morris Memorial Gift
MSMS Foundation
1100 College Street W-190
Columbus, MS 39701

Who can you trust?: Part duh — I mean — deux

Well — it appears waiting for the “writer” of FTVLive to retract this statement…

“If NBC puts (Savannah) Guthrie on (“Meet the Press”), it gives the show a female host, which would be a first.”

…is like leaving the porch light on for Jimmy Hoffa.

After four social media posts — from accounts which I normally use to focus on fun, games, pop culture, etc. — as well as a scathing post from this website and a direct e-mail to the “writer”, nothing from said “writer”. Maybe he’s busy trying to put the toothpaste back into the tube in between daily posts?

But seriously, when you analyze, scrutinize, criticize, or hypothesize someone or something associated with a TV program that launched roughly two years and two months after the end of World War II, you’d better get your facts straight. Yes, “Meet the Press” does go back to 1947. Yes, Martha Rountree co-created “Meet the Press” and moderated the NBC-TV program for its first six years.

To be fair to the “writer”, who has made it clear he wants to see more women and people of color on the air and in news management (a take we should all agree with), I can think of at least a couple of others women who deserved a chance to moderate “Meet the Press” on a permanent basis. The fact of the matter: The list of permanent moderators of the program does not read like members of “an all-boys club”.

There’s a lot more I could write, but I would bury the point. So let’s get to said point.

To send your two cents to the “writer”, e-mail ftvlive (at) gmail (dot) com. I’m expressing the e-mail address this way to lower the risk of spamming.

In the body of the message, politely remind the “writer” his reporting from August 29, 2022, on the possible future status of a couple of anchors of a couple of NBC News programs included an inaccurate statement. “Meet the Press” literally began with Martha Rountree. Request a full retraction from the “writer”.

Who can you trust?

It’s been nearly five years since I produced a TV newscast. The reasons why may have to be saved for a novel based upon real-life events — with names changed to protect innocent and guilty. Think of my last post as an appetizer. The main course is going to have to wait a while.

Even though I’m not involved in day-to-day journalism, I do pitch story ideas and I’m happy to help FOX23’s news team where help is needed.

This leads me to the “brilliant” work of the one-man truth squad at FTVLive.com. I have to put “brilliant” in quotes because, for starters, if I had a nickel for each misspelling, subject-verb disagreement, and other proofreading error that ends up on his website, I could afford to buy a brand new car at its MSRP in one fell swoop — while expecting change soon thereafter and title weeks later.

Has this “writer” ever heard of Grammarly? I don’t mind telling you one of my former FOX23 colleagues recommended Grammarly to me. It’s been a big help in my writing. I wish I had the tool in my journalism days.

When it comes to his bad writing, that’s as far as I’ll go — for now. In late August, the “writer” posted the following. I would post a hotlink — but I won’t because I don’t want to add to his analytics. First, here’s a screen grab of his article from late August of 2022.

(To clarify, the article was dated August 29. The web address would seem to indicate the article was in draft at least one day prior. Either way, the finished product definitely comes from late in the month. The offending part of the article I highlighted in blue.)

Okay, I’m going to keep my opinions about the state of NBC News, its broadcasts, and its anchors to myself. The lack of attribution of sources for this story is alarming, to say the least. The “writer” claims to have worked previously as a news director. Did he practice what he previously preached? Judge for yourself.

But let us look at this sentence again: “If NBC puts Guthrie on MTP, it gives the show a female host, which would be a first.”

Wrong.

Wrong.

Wrong.

WRONG!

Every time I’ve seen this sentence, my blood boils. If he were a TV critic for a major newspaper, his editor would rip him a new one.

The “writer” failed to take a brief look at the long history of “Meet the Press” and the journalists who have moderated it through the decades. The “writer” apparently jumped to the wrong conclusion “Meet the Press” was, and is, moderated by males and only males.

With the possible exception of any female substitute or interim moderator (for example, and I don’t have it on good authority this really happened, Andrea Mitchell could have filled in for Bill Monroe at some point in time between 1978 and 1984), “Meet the Press” history does show the program had, in the “writer’s” words, a “female host”?

Who? For the correct answer, all you have to do is go to the first page of the “Meet the Press” chronology. Take a look at this NBCNews.com-official video which I wish I could embed — but will gladly link. You might have to wait for the answer after a brief ad — but the correct answer appears early in the clip.

https://www.nbcnews.com/meet-the-press/video/mtp-at-70-from-martha-rountree-to-chuck-todd-1089463363711

At this point in TV history, the possibility of seeing a female lead any kind of news program may have seemed like 3720 to 1. No matter how you calculate the odds, “Meet the Press” was that 1 at its genesis.

Oh — but wait — there’s more about Martha Rountree the “writer” didn’t bother to research. Rountree was the co-creator of “Meet the Press”. Further, before “Meet the Press” was on television in 1947, Rountree created “The American Mercury Presents: Meet the Press” — debuting on the Mutual radio network in 1945.

Rountree died in 1999 and lived a full life at the age of 87. Two years before her passing, The New York Times reported Rountree attended a “Meet the Press” golden anniversary celebration. Tim Russert, whose name you most likely associate with the program, said this of Rountree: “She was a news pioneer who helped create a national treasure.” Russert started moderating the program in 1991, at a time when it was on shaky ground, and guided it handily until his passing in 2008.

Think about this for a moment. Before the parenthetically aforementioned Andrea Mitchell, before Jessica Savitch, before Barbara Walters, before Norma Quarles, before Connie Chung, even before Nancy Dickerson (mother of John), there was Martha Rountree. If you are female and are considering entering the world of journalism, take a look at the story of Martha Rountree. You might learn something — would that the “writer” did.

The “writer” needs to issue a retraction and a full apology to his readers, NBC News, all of the staffers at “The Today Show” and “Meet the Press” (whether he likes them or not), and the relatives of Martha Rountree who are still with us. A reference book indicates Rountree married twice and she mothered two daughters.

The “writer” has written about other broadcast journalists issuing apologies for their major misdeeds. Now it’s the “writer’s” turn to issue a mea culpa.


UPDATE 9/5/22: Since Doug’s Place called out the “writer”, he has updated his site. It’s an admitted light update due to the Labor Day holiday.

Of the five new stories published, not one acknowledges Rountree. One of the newest stories acknowledges the stabbing death of a Las Vegas print reporter.

Another offers new developments in the tragic Neena Pacholke story. Pacholke, 27, was a morning anchor at an ABC station in Wisconsin. She recently committed suicide. The new developments are so dark I will respectfully not repeat them here.

This widower is well aware the game of life is not easy to play. If you or someone you know is struggling, help is available by visiting www.988lifeline.org or by simply dialing 988.

This is the end (but be sure about the end, my friend)

For various reasons, I didn’t want to write this. But given recent events, I feel as if I must.

If you cover entertainment and/or pop culture with any regularity, you know the last few weeks have not been easy. Sports and entertainment legends have passed from this life to the next over that time: Nichelle Nichols, Bill Russell, Olivia Newton-John, Pat Carroll; the list, unfortunately, goes on and on.

While their passings have been reported accurately, two others’ stories in particular, originally, were not — the passings of Tony Dow and Anne Heche.

Dow, who played the title character’s older brother on the classic sitcom “Leave it to Beaver”, was admitted into hospice care at a time others erroneously reported his death. Dow actually died a day after entering hospice.

Heche, whose career began on the daytime drama “Another World”, was involved in two car collisions in southern California earlier this month. As her condition worsened, erroneous reports of her passing were moved forward. The actual story: Heche passed away days after being taking off of life support.

Dow’s and Heche’s stories, particularly the latter’s, made me think of a similar story that also was reported inaccurately. I’ll get to that in a moment.

But first, a setup is in order. As clearly indicated in the archives of this blog, I was a TV newscast producer. I still recall the day Prince’s health took a sudden turn for the worse. Initially, there were reports he died — but then co-workers and I weren’t so sure.

The executive producer took some initiative — going ahead and editing aerial video of Prince’s home in Minnesota while keeping an eye for official word from NBC, one of the station’s networks of record, for legitimate word the legendary singer had died. The EP also sought any file footage of Prince in concert, in a movie, etc. Finally having the correct information to go on, it was a breaking story just as the second block of the noon news I produced was starting.

That’s a great example of teamwork. Unfortunately, I have to turn the clock back more than a decade earlier to an incident that was anything but teamwork.

One morning, at approximately 8:30, my old TV station was alerted a student was injured in a horrific crash. The student, who I will only identify as Drew in the interest of anonymity, suffered a lot of injuries and was not expected to survive. Drew was on life support for the rest of the day.

The next morning, I, as the morning producer, call the nursing supervisor at the hospital where Drew was admitted. To my surprise, Drew was still among the living — and in critical condition. So, we reworded the story for the morning newscast in an effort to keep the story, with no new development, fresh.

On this morning, we had a substitute anchor, who I will only identify as Chris (it’s tempting to use the backup anchor’s real name and call this person out; I’m resisting such temptation). I told Chris what I had just written in the previous paragraph. “I checked with the hospital. (Drew) is still living.” “That’s amazing — but we sure need to keep an eye on that story,” Chris said. Hard not to agree.

For nearly all of that morning newscast, the station reported the story accurately. Things took a turn for the wrong when Chris was checking e-mail messages in the newsroom during a break. Keep in mind this was at a time before one could check e-mail on a smartphone.

A friend of Chris’s wrote Drew died in the hospital. Chris, unwisely, didn’t bother to check with anyone else for corroboration. Chris didn’t call the hospital or anyone else for that matter. Chris didn’t even give the rest of us a head’s up — only saying with seconds to go in a commercial break there’s a breaking story. Back from the commercial break, in the closing segment, Chris broke the errant news Drew died — alarmingly without any attribution. Then, we signed off to make way for the network morning show.

That’s when the rest of us asked where Chris got this info. “A friend e-mailed me (Drew) didn’t make it,” Chris said. “Did you check with the hospital?” I asked. “Well — no”, Chris responded with an awkward pause.

Next thing you know, we called the hospital. The nursing supervisor still said Drew was in critical condition. Chris started to cry — realizing the backup anchor made a terrible mistake. So, when the network morning show allowed for an extended station break, Drew’s status changed in the top story of our 7:25 a.m. cut-in.

Later that day, Drew did succumb to the injuries sustained in the previous day’s crash. The station spent the rest of the day reporting on Drew’s passing — while apologizing on the air to the family, and the rest of the viewers, for Chris’s dreadful mistake. During the next morning’s local news, I made damn sure Chris read apologies.

Weeks later, Chris was suspended for a week for an unrelated misdeed. Playing fast and loose with the facts on two different stories resulted in Chris’s firing. Months later, Chris, somehow, found work elsewhere here in the American southeast at one particular television station — and then another in the same market. Apparently, Chris has left TV news altogether. For similar infractions? I honestly don’t know. I lost touch with Chris since the ultimate dismissal here. It’s probably just as well.

Back in the here and now, news broke of Nichelle Nichols’ passing during Rock 104 RockTrax, my Sunday radio show. Friends wrote about her on social media — and a few sci-fi blogs were reporting her passing. Even as a recovering journalist, I still wasn’t sure. I knew Nichols was in declining health at the time. So I waited until news broke on the Associated Press wires.

About a minute or two later, the AP indeed broke the news the original “Star Trek” cast member had died. National news outlets (FOX, NBC, ABC, etc.) echoed on their official social media presence. Suddenly, I had the correct story. Next thing you know, I’m breaking the news on the radio Nichols died.

The bottom line here is this. Sometimes it pays to be last on the story and have everything correct in the story — instead of being first on the story and going on the record with a lot of misinformation. Chris learned that lesson the hard way. So did certain people in the media when they reported the deaths of Tony Dow and Anne Heche too soon.

It’s gonna take a lotto luck (reprise)

As a voter, I wrote the state representative and senator who represent me in Jackson — urging them to vote no on the lottery. I got no response from one of them — and one response from the other. The other who responded assured me there would be a vote of no from that person. If I said the politician’s name, you’d likely know it.

Despite my concerns, the majority does rule — and the majority approved plans for a state lottery. With no turning back and plans going full speed ahead, what’s next?

There are two big things to think about. Here’s the first. If you hear proponents sing the praises of the lottery and note how it will help improve schools, infrastructure, etc., please take it all with a grain of salt.

As a refresher, let’s revisit this episode of the short-lived reboot of the classic quiz show “Now You See It” and cue the episode up to the 6:37 mark for a quick math lesson from the Ohio Lottery.

Going forward, if your school’s PTO makes plans for a spring festival in addition to the annual fall festival, you’ll know the Mississippi Lottery isn’t helping.

If school districts near you put levies and/or bond issues up for voters’ approval, you’ll know the Mississippi Lottery isn’t helping. Levies and bond issues were a combined thing when I lived in the Dayton area for most of the 1980s.

If you’re not seeing construction signs and orange and white barrels near roads and bridges that still show their age, you’ll know the Mississippi Lottery isn’t helping.

The other big thing to think about can be summed up in two words. Play responsibly.

If you have the money to burn on lottery tickets, good luck. As the punny title to this and the original post implies, you’ll need it. If you can’t spare the dimes, don’t.

Going back to my days in Ohio, I remember a time the long-running lottery game show “Cash Explosion” was in its infancy. It’s still on the air today, despite being canceled for “Make Me Famous, Make Me Rich” and only to be resurrected a year later.

Circa 1988, I can still remember seeing a lady at the service counter of a grocery store buying a scratch-off ticket for a chance to play for the then top prize of $50,000. As I recall, if a lottery player scratched off the ticket and uncovered the word “entry” in triplicate, that lucky person is one step closer to playing for the big money. If not, he or she gets some consolation prize or, likely, nothing at all.

So back to the lady — who was unlucky with her first ticket. She struck out with her second ticket. Her third ticket was not the charm. I lost count how many more times she tried to buy a winning ticket. All I can remember was her noticeable losing streak. I made a mental note from there.

Exposing a fake

For those who’ve wondered or asked, yes, I have dated other women since Cindy’s passing more than a decade ago. If you got to know Cindy really well, you’ll recall her father died in the mid-1990s and her mother later remarried. Now that our marriage ended under the articles of “’til death do us part” before we could celebrate the births of children or grandchildren, I’m searching for my next success story in the relationship world.  Cindy’s mom and stepdad have encouraged me to search for same.

It’s true Cindy and I met online. However, as we got to know each other, we realized we had mutual friends — some of whom I hadn’t seen in years. As our relationship leveled up, we realized there was a higher power in play.

In what I call postmarital dating, the internet hasn’t helped. You name any legitimate website or app — and the odds are good I tried it and have nothing to show for it (save for wasted time, wasted effort, perhaps wasted energy and, at times, wasted money).

It appears social networking doesn’t help much either. It is here I must expose a fake.

Earlier today, I learned about the story of one lady’s apparent search for love. I give you, or perhaps loan you for the moment, @MaryDennisDoyl1 on Twitter.

Mary Dennis Doyle notes she’s in California and looking for a long-term relationship. Would she be willing to travel and find her Mr. Right? Time will tell.

If she’s looking for love, she needs to be honest. On this video clip…

…she doesn’t say her name is Mary; she says her name is — Amber.

In case the above clip has been deleted by the time you read this (and, for that matter, her  Twitter account in its entirety), here the transcription. “Hey, guys. This is Amber,” she said in the bathroom selfie video right at the start. Automatic fail. “I am totally wasted,” she continued — with an unintelligible end to her sentence due to low volume and, well, the admitted fact she’s drunk. “I am having a really, really, really great time,” she noted. Then, she told viewers she was drinking champagne out of what looked like a Dixie cup.

How authentic is the clip? Judge for yourself. Is it a good idea to post drunk selfie videos? I’d say no. But when you have the name “Mary” in your profile, “Amber” in your video and “Amber” is nowhere else to be found in said profile, odds are good you’re faking all this.

Bottom line: When you’re looking for love, online or offline, be honest about things.